I’m so self-aware that it hurts. I’m constantly analyzing why I’m feeling the way I feel, and I generally know the source of the emotion I’m feeling. I’m not sure that I always deal with the emotion in the healthiest of ways (I’m an emotional eater and shopper!) It’s like, I know what I’m feeling, but I don’t always know how to fix the thing that is causing me to feel that way. And I don’t internalize when I’m upset – I talk about it, to anyone and everyone. It’s usually the way I deal with an issue or an emotional conflict. This sometimes leads to unwanted advice that I don’t always want to take, but then I get all confused and don’t always trust myself to fix the problem myself. So I might be self-aware, but I need to build my confidence in myself to find the proper ways to deal with the emotions I am feeling.
And this comes into direct conflict with the fact that I am a very empathetic person. I’m so worried about what other people are thinking and feeling (although I’m not always very good at reading this in others), that I will often compromise my own emotions and feelings to help others feel better. I put myself in their shoes and can understand how they are feeling, even if I might not agree. It can be very emotionally draining and even physically exhausting, at times. I think my empathy is one of my best qualities, and I’ve had friends that have told me as such, but I worry that I sometimes exhibit empathy at the cost of my own feelings.
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